What If...

Being a dog trainer and animal rescuer is hard and sometimes it is downright painful. Today was a painful day. As a rescuer I am subjected to heartbreak after heartbreak and falling in love a million times; as a trainer I am faced with so many dogs that have "potential", if they had just the right home or could get into a foster home. I am faced with seeing that potential and hoping very hard that someone else sees it too because there aren't nearly enough foster homes and sometimes there isn't "just the right" home. I have internalized the motto "I can't save them all, but I can save this one" I know I can only help so many but often there are dogs that you come across that just speak to you, to your soul, and you try maybe just a little harder for that certain one. I've met and loved quite a few of those dogs in my years of rescue work and now as a trainer it's even more so as now I can see behaviors that maybe others don't see, things that could use a little polishing and make a fantastic agility dog, or a wonderful companion for an older person or a great all around family dog; my interactions and my ability to fall in love has been so enriched by the knowledge I have gained on this road to becoming a dog trainer.

I spoke of her before; Infinity, even posted her picture on this blog. Since the time that blog was written she had been adopted and was in a home for a few months. Recently she was returned to the shelter much to my devastation due to a vague excuse of "not getting along with the other dogs". It's very possible, Infinity was a rowdy, rough player and she was a relatively assertive female so it was believable to think there was some not nice behavior cropping up. Unfortunately the adopters were not encouraged (at least to my knowledge) to seek help from us trainers to evaluate the situation before she was brought back to the shelter. So I was very saddened to see her back in the kennels yet at the same time I was so happy to see her again. I know she remembered me, I felt it. She buried her head in my lap when I got her out and snuggled up so close to me it was like she was trying to crawl into my skin! Oh how I had missed her and oh how I loved her. I knew she did not have long before the kennel stress behaviors began again with her so we tried to get her into the public eye as much as possible. She went to two separate public events and did really well at both of them. Then my life became crazy. Between getting ready to move and traveling to look at houses I wasn't at the shelter as often as I would have liked. I went last week but knew that seeing her would be so upsetting that I selfishly did not interact with her. I scrambled around all this week trying to get things done specifically so I could go and spend my last day at the shelter with her. I needed to see her. She wasn't there.

What if, is a phrase that can bring the strongest person to their knees; it regularly does such a thing for animal rescuers, it's doing it to me today.

PLEASE if you are in any position at all to become a foster home, do it, they are so desperately needed and there can never be enough. You can even designate yourself an emergency home for dogs like Infinity that could have used that breather to be re-assessed and given a chance to prove she is more than this one transgression. Becoming a foster home could literally save a dogs life.

RIP Sweet Finnie

The many meanings of home...

I have to apologize up front, this isn't exactly a dog training or even really an animal related post. It certainly contains thoughts on animals though!

I am 37, and in those 37 years I have lived many places, done many things and met many people. At this point in my life I have begun analyzing what "home" means and I have come to realize that one little word has so many meanings and can represent so many things. A couple examples; I was born in Massachusetts, my family is still there, so for me that is home. However I grew up and lived more years of my life in Vermont and so there is a much stronger feeling of home for that area. I feel at "home" reading a good book, hiking in the woods, lying on the beach, teaching dogs and their owners, in my husbands arms and holding on to my children. So you see…many meanings. The one place I never considered home was MO. Sure, I would say "I'm going home" and mean my house in MO, but I never felt at home here, in fact I hated it for a long time. I felt out of place and confused by the culture, hated the landscape and saw no beauty around me at all. It was a miserable existence here for a long time. Now, as I prepare to leave and head to yet another home, NH (which actually has a strong feeling of home for me), I am coming to realize that the feeling of home can sneak up on you and can come in the form of people rather than just places. My definition of home is stretching to include some amazing people that I never really realized had claimed a place in my heart until this moment. I would like to express my feeling of gratitude and love for people I hadn't realized had become my home.

I thank Alicia and Janette for their profound friendship, silliness and companionship; you both kept me sane in a crazy sort of way.

I thank Misti Fry, Carrie Galvan and all the trainers with Sidekick Dog Training for helping me uncover my passion and encouraging this journey I am on; For teaching me so very much and making me your friend. I am forever grateful for the path you helped set me on.

I thank Amber Wallace for being my first friend at The Summit and helping me feel like I fit in a little better!

I thank Penny and Brian for letting me see that we could fit in here and find like minded people if we only looked. Your friendship has meant so much to me.

I thank Laura Skiles for raising such amazing daughters that my daughter just loves. They are the type of friends I wish every parents child can make. I sincerely hope our children can keep connected!

I thank the amazing people that care for my animals. Camp Bow Wow, Beanie's home away from home. A place and staff I am so very grateful for and whom I will miss terribly. Brenda Treece, who cares for my cats as if they were her own and whose generous heart and rescue spirit is heartwarming to behold. Dr. Denise, who has seen 2 of my animals over the rainbow bridge and did so with great compassion and respect and who has cared for my other animals with love and kindness.

I thank the amazing teachers and staff at The Summit that encouraged my children and supported them in their educational pursuits as well as cared for their unique selves. It is an environment I will miss greatly but one I am so thankful my children were a part of even if for a short time.

 I may not have appreciated it at first but I certainly do now, you have all helped redefine "home" for me and will forever be a part of that "home" feeling. Home truly is where your heart is and after all the places I've been and people I've met, my heart seems to have a great capacity for that word and I have a feeling it will only increase. I extend my deepest gratitude to you all.

Is your canine companion a 'Dog About Town'?

Can your dog watch politely as other dogs walk by? Can your dog pass by another dog and it's owner without coming unglued? Will your dog come to you even though there are some really fun looking geese waddling by? Will your dog lie quietly by your feet as you have a picnic with a friend who also happens to have a dog at their feet? If not don't despair! These are some of the things we at Sidekick Dog Training work on in our new Dogs About Town class. It's a really fun class and this week we will be practicing approaching other dogs and their owners politely as well as learning an important tool… the Emergency U-Turn. This may sound simple enough but have you ever tried to drag your dog one way while they are clambering to go the other way? Not easy right? The Emergency U-Turn is a great tool to have in situations that may be scary for your dog or potentially troublesome, like if there is a loose dog running around. Having your dogs attention even in these circumstances is imperative and that is what we help our students achieve in this class. We are also going to have a "practice picnic". Teaching the dogs to settle when we are seated even with other dogs and food close by helps make your dog a welcome addition around the community.
 As pets become a bigger part of our lives we naturally want to include them in our family activities, but an unruly dog is no fun to be around and makes for a stressful outing. Teaching our dogs polite public behavior can go a long way to keeping them included in the family fun. It can also help keep dogs in their homes rather than being given up as hopeless cases! Training in a fun and positive way increases your bond with your dog and keeps you and your dog engaged in life!
 If you don't think your dog is quite ready to be bombarded with heavy distractions there are many ways to get them ready; private lessons, smaller group classes, etc. whatever you choose you won't be sorry and your dog will be that much happier for it!

Are you having fun with your dog??

In answer to my own title question I would have to say that for the last two months I have NOT been having fun with my dog! I know, bad trainer, bad owner, bad friend! Life gets crazy sometimes and when school started for my children my life was no exception! I have been right out straight for two months. The only time I really spent with Beanie was during training class or pet therapy visits. Sure we live in the same home but my mind was always so preoccupied that it was a miracle I remembered to feed him!! Our training consisted of learning a routine that we were to perform with the other Sidekick trainers, needless to say at times it was very stressful and frustrating. If you've trained dogs for any amount of time (and if you haven't here's a little tip) you know that when you are stressed and frustrated your dog knows it and the whole training session is shot and not fun for either of you. Best case, you just have a poor session, worse case you chip away at your relationship. I should know better, Beanie is so tuned in to me that he shuts down when I get stressed and frustrated in a training session. I learned that early on in our training. We trained at a place he was not comfortable in and where they were trying to have me make him do things he didn't really want (or need) to do (this was NOT with Misti or Sidekick by the way) and so I had to consciously decide to teach him my way, teach him the things I thought were important and lower my expectations so we had success. It worked brilliantly and of course he passed his CGC and his Pet Therapy test! This routine was really straining us, not because it was hard but because I felt it had to be perfect! I have a Pyrenees, not a golden retriever or a german shepherd or a border collie, I am lucky Beanie does any of the stuff he does for me. Somewhere along the way to learning this routine I forgot that. Luckily I remembered in time to salvage our training and make the routine a success, but more importantly I had a wake up call that I need to be gentler to myself and to him and if it's not fun then we shouldn't be doing it or I need to figure out how to make it fun again! That is my responsibility as an owner and as his friend and trusted companion. Fun should be the next best thing in your relationship with your dog, right up there with love and trust! So go hug your dog and play a game, it won't be time wasted!

Here is the video of our routine:

Just like everyone else...

I am often one of those people that don't follow my own advice.  I am also one of those people that often avoids, ignores or is simply too busy to deal with a problem head on. Alas, I am also one of those people that knows how to handle a problem but just doesn't want to do the work. I am often my own worst training client! So when my foster dog began showing resource guarding towards my dog I just did a perfunctory management, I put away the toys he was guarding AFTER he had already practiced the bad guarding behavior…bad trainer! I have vowed, in recent days, to really work on this for a multitude of reasons. The first being I need the experience and practice and the others being I hate seeing my dog bullied and this foster dog needs to be adopted so I should do my part to make him more desireable. That is what a foster home is for after all!

So here is my plan and what I've done so far. All bones have gone away. Only one dog goes out the door at a time (my dog first, however I have yet to decide if that is the best choice). And I am more proactive when they play and interrupt it to bring the intensity down and then let them play again. I have also brought the crate back out for my foster dog. Let me tell you, the crate has already shown a HUGE difference in tension in the house! Before, both dogs were allowed to be loose in the living room (where all the altercations took place) and I noticed that Bruce (the foster dog) was starting to even guard the living room! He was also allowed to roam loose in our bedroom at night because…well, because I hate dogs that whine and cry in the crate and I am a sucker! Plus he has bilateral hip dysplasia and it was pressed upon me that a crate would be hard on him. Beanie however loves his crate and preferred to sleep in it at night.

So what I did was put the crate for Bruce in our bedroom hoping that might make it less miserable for him (it had previously been in the living room where he'd be all by himself at night). He readily accepted it and went in on his own the very first day! He's been great in it at night! Problem solved? Not quite, but we are on our way and I have ordered a book to help with the rest of the modification protocol. 'Mine' by Jean Donaldson is going to be my manual for taking care of this issue. I highly recommend pretty much anything by her but I am especially excited to get this book and get started. I am encouraged by the progress I have seen so far, they are more relaxed and playful with each other, there is no more living room guarding and the door behavior is great, of course the bones are still not left out, they only get them in their crates.

So while I may be like everyone else in most ways, in this I am different; I have the tools needed to work at a problem and I enjoy the process of learning and training, even if my motivation is a bit slow to get jump started! Wish me luck as we go along this journey!

Things that make you go hmmmmm….

You know how you can go along in your daily life, meet someone and think you know them and then BOOM, something happens and you are completely taken off guard? Yeah, that doesn't usually happen to me. Not to toot my own horn or to sound overly judgmental but I feel that for the most part I am a pretty good judge of character, although I will admit I have been hoodwinked in my life although mostly it involved some serious denial on my part about the reality of the situation. My point is…I find this to be pretty true when I meet dogs as well. I find I get a feeling about a dog and if I can't shake it, it's usually confirmed by a formal assessment. There have been times when I've been wrong or not seen some significant behaviors but for the most part, so far in my dog "career", I think I've been a pretty good judge of character. Unfortunately, in the case with dogs, that is a pretty sucky thing to excel at!

Sometimes I wish I could be blissfully oblivious and just love every dog I come across as most people claim they do. I wish I could have no qualms about sticking my face into a dogs and hugging and kissing it. I wish I believed when a dog is frantically climbing my body and jumping at my face that it is a sweet gesture. I don't. I can't even try to make myself. I cringe nearly every time I see people interact with their dogs or more often than not strange dogs. I wonder daily how more people don't get bit and I've come to the conclusion that dogs are far superior to us and we don't nearly give them enough credit for allowing our stupid species to continue to exist in blissful ignorance while they bare the brunt of the responsibility to inhibit themselves to keep us safe. Admittedly there are dogs that don't give two "you know what's" about our safety and will tell us off with those wonderfully powerful teeth of theirs. And yet somehow the burden of blame always falls on them.

But that is where my conundrum starts, I believe we should not inhibit the dogs ability to express his fears or anxiety but I think dangerous dogs should not be languishing in rescues or shelters or homes even. First it is not fair to the caretakers and society as a whole and second it's not fair to the dog. Can you imagine living your whole life in a constant state of fear or anxiety and alertness for the first sign of danger? I realize people do it every day but they have the ability to talk and express those fears and rationalize and seek help if necessary. Dogs can't do that. Some dogs live their lives as if they are in a constant state of warfare where it is kill or be killed. That is a great amount of stress to bear. It must be exhausting. While these dogs are languishing there are more stable dogs roaming the streets or languishing on a backyard chain or in an animal control facility facing euthanasia because all the rescue groups are full! Where is the justice in that?

We can't save them all and the general adopting public are not certified trainers or behaviorists and are not looking for a problem dog to work on and "cure". They want that sweet, friendly dog that will tolerate and endure all the hugs, kisses and silly things we humans do to objects of our affection. So my job is to find those dogs, to use that judgement I have developed through studying and observing and trusting my gut. It is my job to help make room for those diamonds in the rough and help them shine. It is my job to teach the public that hugging a strange dog is a BAD idea, that giving a leash correction on a choke chain carries so much baggage with it and causes a myriad of other problems, that when a dog stiffens or growls the best thing you can do is give the dog space because that is EXACTLY what he is telling you to do! Some days my job sucks, some days "feeling" what the outcome will be of an assessment and then being right is very draining; but then finding that really great dog and teaching her all kinds of tools to help her find a great home helps ease the tragicness of the other. Most days I have to remember what I do makes a difference to that one dog, and really that's all anyone can hope for in life, to make a difference in one life. Here's hoping I make a difference in your life Infinity.

Infinity is waiting for her forever family in the Humane Society of Southwest Missouri.

I met an icon!!

It's taken me a while to write this post, I'm still processing everything I saw and learned almost two weeks ago in a one day seminar by Sue Sternberg. If you are unfamiliar with her you should definitely check out her link! She has been an outspoken advocate for better quality of life conditions for the country's shelter dogs and has been a controversial figure at times because of it. She believes greatly in the quality of a dogs life versus quantity and it has at times pitted her against the "No Kill" movement. Regardless of the controversy she is a gifted trainer, great speaker and has developed some wonderful tools for shelters all over to implement into their programs.

The seminar we attended was the last day of a 3 day seminar and it focused on body language, evaluations and dog/dog interactions. It was eye-opening to say the least in discovering little nuances a dog may provide that would otherwise go unnoticed; the difference between a side nose lick or a front nose lick, a partial freeze and a total freeze, a play bow with an edge versus one with a soft body…I could go on and on, it was amazing! We saw all these things on live dogs and got to experience the evaluation right along with her. We saw some jaw dropping things and some common things we may dismiss that should not be dismissed.

Overall I thoroughly enjoyed the conference, she is a wonderful speaker and for me the best part was holding her dog while assisting her in a dog/dog introduction. An experience I won't soon forget! I will see her whole seminar again someday and I hope this is the first of many seminars, by other amazing icons, to come! I am dying to see Patricia McConnell!!

Here is a picture of Sue and I ( I totally geeked out and had her sign my book and pose with me, I get a little weird around people I find important!)

Thanks for visiting!!